When intended parents are exploring the possibility of surrogacy, there are many questions that will be asked. A lot of the questions will have to do with the relationship between the parents and the surrogate. To be sure, you will want to build a strong and healthy relationship with the surrogate, but this may take some time.
Surrogacy can be a stressful and challenging journey for both the parents and the surrogate. And since the surrogate might be in your life for a very long time, it is important to build a relationship and make this journey as easy as possible. Above and Beyond Surrogacy, your surrogate pregnancy service, offers tips to building a relationship with your surrogate.
To build a strong relationship, you need a foundation of trust. You do not have to blindly trust your surrogate, but it is important that you at least show the surrogate you trust her to carry your child for nine months.
It is important that both parents and surrogate are honest about expectations. There is no right or wrong way to get and stay involved with the surrogate, but it is important to embrace communication.
Think About Your Surrogate
Many surrogates feel that they are involved with one of the most meaningful acts of their lives. You will want to ensure that you make her feel proud of her unselfishness. Surrogates who enjoy positive experiences with the intended parents are often all too eager to remain on the journey even after the birth of the child.
You should also keep in mind that your surrogate has a life outside of the pregnancy. Your surrogate may be a mother, wife and have a full-time career. And she will definitely have other commitments that will need to be tended to during the pregnancy. So be sure to be flexible and remember that the pregnancy is just a part of her life that needs attention.
Even though you are all working on building a healthy and lasting relationship, there will be the need to set boundaries. It can be really easy to move too fast and reveal too much information about each other. Start things off as you would in any relationship by going slow and easy in the beginning.
It is important that the parents and surrogate connect on an interactive level. Building a relationship just through communication is fine, but you will get to know each other at a whole new level if you are out doing things together.
That said, meet with your surrogate at a favorite restaurant or take her to the movies. These are just a few activities that help build stronger relationships.
Both parties need to have empathy. A surrogate needs to understand the pain and frustration of infertility or the other reasons why a couple cannot have their own children and parents need to remember that the surrogate is giving her time and body to help you have a child.
If you have questions about surrogacy, call Above and Beyond Surrogacy.